Complaining about services is where I can flex my complaining muscles effectively in person. It’s not complaining so much as getting results. My Mum is a very gentle, shy person but she taught me a lesson in complaining. Having bought an electric sewing maching in 1996, I was alarmed when it started up by itself, and started sewing away on its own at full speed. When smoke came out, I was even more alarmed and the plug was roasting to the touch! I lugged it back into town to complain, and my Mum met me at the shop. I thought the sewing-maching man would refund me the money without a problem, but he started to argue! My will was flagging at that stage, and to my delight, mild-mannered Mum stepped in, and just kept asking ‘what are you going to do about it’?, until he caved in and I got a cash-refund. Go Mum!
Then there are the times when your health is on the line, or someone in your family. It’s very stressful when you’re in a vulnerable position of patient or next-of-kin, but it has to be done. It’s difficult sometimes to take the emotional disappointment out of a complaint, but it makes it much easier to make progress by not involving anger or resentment. If the person involved isn’t willing to do something about it, find out who is responsible for it, and make contact with them. Sometimes the service-provider genuinely has no idea they are coming across in the way they do, and appreciates the feedback. I use online forms for giving feedback too and I think it’s very useful to read reviews from others.
The one exception about complaining is a note to myself; do not complain when on steroids for MS-relapses! I become completely fearless on steroids and once voiced my dissatisfaction about a tough fellow-passenger smoking on the bus. Passengers near me drew in their breaths as they waited for a major row to erupt. The smoker said ‘ye wha’?’ in anger, in answer to my request that he extinguish his cigarette. I repeated my request politely but firmly. He put the cigarette out. I then spent the bus-journey in a state of panic when I realised that the smoker looked like he might knife me. Nothing happened though, I got ‘well done’ nods from passengers around me, and I was rather elated at having won the bus-fight. Next time though I’ll wait until I’m not on steroids to complain.
Stephen Hawking said ‘People won’t have time for you if you are always angry or complaining’. What a man...
Further reading
- MS World-Forums: Huge international message-board
- Health complaints
- Office of the Ombudsman: for complaints about public bodies including HSE
- Consumer complaints
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